This applies in many situations in life, but I think it is a good gauge of where you might be in your life. I went through a period recently where I had been out of town for a month, then came back to 5 weeks of moving my daughter and myself while on my hardest rotation yet. I was pulling 16 hour days every day, and it left no time for working out or relaxing with my daughter or my dog. I was tired, and I didn’t have the drive to do much of the usual planning, research and preparation I was used to doing. I was doubting my devotion to clinical pharmacy. Why else would I not want to do what it takes to reach my goal?
At first, I panicked, but then I listened to myself and looked at my actions. My lack of direction, rather than a bad thing, was a sign that I was redirecting my life. Much like a car slowing coming into an intersection before it turns off onto another street, I was slowing down in order to redirect. When I stopped panicking and judging myself for being “non-productive”, I began the internal search of what had changed and what my needs are.
Sometimes, our bodies and our emotions have a way of trumping the mind. If that happens to you or to someone you know (as it most likely will when in a demanding situation), try and think of it as a sign from your heart that maybe it needs to take that sideroad that you had forgotten was there, or had not even seen. After about a month, I have found a new direction that fits my personality, and it still involves clinical pharmacy, infused with my strongest interests.
The opposite is true as well. When you find yourself engrossed in something that may pull you from your original path, listen to that. Explore your interest, and see if you can find a way to make it part of your career path.
NOTE: I wrote this blog for ASHP (http://ashpblog.squarespace.com/), but it started with a comment I had made to someone regarding the heart. If you start shutting someone out, or you are on the painful receiving end of someone shutting off to you, that is a message. Listen to it, find a way to accept it, and for God’s sake …. Let the other person know what is going on! Take care of your heart and those who care about you…..